I have the sudden urge to buy a Snuggie and wear it to the grocery store.
he showed up at my house with a hand-stiched sweater that said "girlfriend?"
Going to a jewelry store high is not a good idea. I look like mr.t's wife.
I woke up in the penthouse and did lines off the to of the fireplace. This is not real.
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
All he was doing was sitting in the car, staring. We asked him what was wrong and he just turned, smiled, and said "everything has its own pair of boots"
ill give you food and tequilla and penis and joy
Just followed a blind kid around for 20 minutes to see how awesome his guide dog was. And he was pretty fucking awesome
Glow Paint looked great for the Black Light Party last night, Tonight having a glow in the dark Pizza on my arm, not so much.
I went from looking for a bong to home decor in a 10 minute span. This is what being an adult is all about!
Not entirely sure how I got drunk off 2 mimosas but here I am
So I woke and tried to get up. Then I realised my foot was stuck in the pocket of the pool table.
He went in for a kiss so I shook his hand instead.
I fucking hate them. They came over and sat on me and made out. On top of me. Who the fuck does that?
Unless it has to do with ramen, goldfish, cheese, or rugby, don't talk to me.
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