apparently you CAN get banned from Nascar.
i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
Well that's not true. She had two social skills. She kept them in her bra
Nobody needs to come anywhere. Except on your face.
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
all we did was drink wine and talk about how people who dont have facebook dont exist.
i hate this class. from the way they're all staring you would think they've never seen a girl in basketball shorts, heels and sunglasses.
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Don't send me nudes asking me to come fuck you on lunch break then send me a video of kids you're babysitting.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
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