We just all danced like dinosaurs in the center of the dance floor.
We're talking about addictions in class and there's a girl 2 rows in front of me on Farmville. Hello, example.
the cop then proceeds to point out the "proud parent of a dare graduate" bumper sticker and say well i guess it's time to take that off
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
Streaking across a girls college rugby game is probably the best, and most painful, decision I've ever made
I mass texted 4 of you for a booty call. Please reply all when responding so only one of you shows up. Last one is a rotten egg.
when the officer asked him if he had been drinking, he just goes, "yeah, you?" then falls onto the table.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I was smelling my bathroom to make sure it didn't reek of weed...I spaced out and realized I was face to the wall sniffing it for 5 minutes.
Mainly I just wanna pet bunnies. And purple chicks. Well any color chicks if I close my eyes. But purple if I open them.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
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