Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
Who was more unwelcome: The two of us at the party last night, or Kimmy Gibler at the Tanner residence?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
im looking at burger kings website. there isnt one anywhere close to where we were last night. i think it was sent from heaven
Thanks for the drunken voicemail of bird calls. Love and miss you, too.
Some guy wearing a horse mask just knocked on my door and started whinnying. I opened the door and he was like, "...oh sorry, wrong room..." so awk.
Can't wait to hear which one of you won the 'fuck a bigger geek' contest last night. Queen Amidala vs Lara Croft. See you at breakfast.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Well, I saw an Olympian's genitals tonight, so it can't be that bad.
I don't trust his life but I trust his penis.
if you were broke and planning on using koolaid as a tequila chaser which flavor would you pick?
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
I just caught your son trying to perform fellatio on himself. What do I do?