real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Theres a fat guy wearing a speedo. Someone just got puked on, and didnt even react. Whats happening?
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
all I wanna do is swim in an Olympic sized pool of Gatorade and tylenol.
It was like stroking your vagina with a cloud.
She really is something else.
Words cannot describe what though. The best way to describe her is to say it like watching a bear and a whale have sex. You don't know why it's happening or how. But it's rather funny and you can't look away.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Some toppless girl just walked past me in the hall and gave me half a carton of smokes. I have never been more aroused.
I can't have my last hookup before 21 have been behind a dumpster
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
Don't masturbate while listening to Pandora. Just came during a buffalo wild wings commercial and I feel really weird about it.
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Next guy I fuck must be a cowboy
Just bedazzled a flask, while drinking out of it. Hot glue is EVERYWHERE.
Yep. Just fucked a 34 year old on the football field where we both went to high school. That's a story for the grandkids.
Randomize
