It's not real sex if he's just convulsing inside of you.
Hahahaha do you think bella ever gave edward head?
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
Its funny that cleaning up pieces of water balloons and shot glasses every morning is becoming a routine
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I have so many hands. So. Many. Hands. I can feel arms that I don't have yet. They tickle. I can see the blood in my eyes. I think something is happening. The hands!!! I'm ticking myself with hands I don't have yet! I can't stop giggling about my notyet hands!
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
Oh God! I'm naked from the waist down playing records. Too drunk. I don't even know what to do.
Balls out but with a shirt on. Eating ravioli. I don't know how to deal with this.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I like her. She smells like old lady but tastes like whiskey
Today was my cousin's Kindergarten graduation. I happen to also think of it as a MILF convention.
I thought about mashed potatoes the whole way home
So I woke up alone in the hotel room clutching a bible to my chest. Explain, please.
Another thing to add to the list of things not to do while I'm drunk......explain to the upstairs neighborr how to have quiet orgasams......she now thinks I want to be part of a threesome......fuck my life
is it still considered wake n bake if you wake up at 2 pm?
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