they have pregnancy tests at the dollar store
I feel like that is one of those things that you should not cheap out on.
consequently i now know what mace tastes like
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
i'm sitting in the pool eating chicken pot pie with my little brother's friend. moments like these are the reason i love weed.
I was so high that i was talking shit about a girl I was with via text, and I handed the phone to her so she could type the shit I was trying to say.
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
he was very distressed by my statements that there could have been balls on shoulders without awareness
I told him id do anything with him and he said angry pirate? So I said okay. Never seeing him again.
What's an angry pirate?
You dont want to know. If someone offers say no. Never ever do the angry pirate. Ever.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I'm home alone drinking wine, so high, scrubbing my house down... This is what my thirsty thursday has become
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
What happened last night? I'm too scared to get out of bed and see the destruction.
First of all, check to see if that naked guy is still alive. He didn't look to be breathing when I left
Well I just woke up to no pants, Gatorade on the headboard along with an uneaten steak, and the instinct I was a giant asshole.
some kid just came up 2 me bleeding yelling "thats how u riot"
Randomize
