Just ran to the store on my way to the office to buy Diet Coke...the guy in front of me let me cut because it was 4 more minutes until 8am, so he wouldn't be able to purchase his vodka. I love Wisconsin
I just spent $27 on things to pee on.
I just found a beer bottle in my xmas tree while disassembling it. God, I'm going to miss the holidays.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
Just curious... Do you still have the cocks bracelet? You know, the one we pass around to whoevers been the biggest slut recently?
False alarm I know hes alive because when i tried shaking him awake he pissed his pants and rolled over..
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
My heart says buy the granny panties, but my vagina says don't throw in the towel yet.
I'm just concerned as to why his penis is two different colors.
Dude, you can't drink while watching Star Trek. You hardly understand it sober.
It's an alien shaped cup though. i think that'll help me absorb.
I don't think it counts as a booty call at 6:30 pm.
Long fucking story. But hey I got an orgasm and breakfast so I'm winning.
all I remember is screming at her "I want you and your tortillas... DEAD"
I bet he’d be surprised by the epic blow job he’d get if he stopped talking about his wife long enough for me to get in the mood
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