He started yelling "we're making a baby" mid thrust.. probably not the right guy for me right?
Our teacher totally just got outed in class by a speaker from some lesbian cooperative house
Exactly. wat kind of friend would i be if i even pretended to give a shit about ur problems
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
I went to bed at ten on a Friday night I have virtues to spare
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
I think he fucked my hip out of place.
I'm on a party bus with a stripper pole with middle aged women who have all started drinking
God bless your soul.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
All I ever wanted was my bed, Tylenol, and total darkness. Instead I had a pervert with porno posters who blares german rock calling me tootsie pop. How was your saturday night?
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