We won't sleep together?
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
With the way things had been going, I was never more excited for a person to cum
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
The girl beside me at the laundromat is bitching a guy out on the phone for jizzing on her bedspread. She had to use a triple machine to wash it.
Just saw someone tackle someone else to the ground for their coors light; he's not getting back up.
Yea, now that Irene is hitting us stores aren't selling any alcohol; beer is now a precious commodity.
grandma made pot brownies .. oh god bless us everyone
Let's celebrate our freedom by getting high and doing stupid shit.
He's a Republican and an Ohio State fan idk how far this can go.
I spent two entire hours explaining to a guy why I wouldn't make out with him. How was your night?
are you fucking roseanne barr in there?
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
I literally heard an 'oh my god' when the shirtless Tongan appeared.
Randomize
