Happy Easter!!!
I'm an idiot
I accidentally had phone sex last night
I'll forget this but out at 4am with a lesbian model at lil waynes bday party for the record
I don't think your that much of a whore. your like a whore-let. a mini whore.
My parents showed me my IQ test from fourth grade, I'm shitting on my potential.
Literally lying on a futon being hand fed bacon
Fuck you.
Do you remember me making bird noises at the bartender with some guy at the bar last night?
I think I ate my cheesy fiesta potatoes cup.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Just told some little girl not to judge me as I brushed my teeth in the target bathroom
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
I just want cinnabon and vodka.
Good thing he's hot and my vagina likes him or I'd be at Dennys right now.
100000% expect a picture of my ass in them
one of my students asked me today if i was having a baby. fuckin 4 year olds and their lack of filter. time to get back to the gym i guess
Randomize
