Don't know whats worst me sharding on her a bit or her believing me when i told her she did it...
bad to tell him im pregnant over fbook chat?
just took my ibuprofen with ramen broth, yay college
Why is there a cactus in the microwave?
Don't worry about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
and thats when we got a drunken mammogram in the middle of cvs pharmacy
My google history shows every combination of "red lobster cheesy biscuits" possible.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I was going through my paperwork and I found the lifetime warranty card for my 14" dildo. I saved it. You know, just in case.
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do you think royal wedding drunk calls for wine or tequila?
You tried to get the Waffle House waitress to put a candle in your cheesy hash browns.
Peeing out the car window on the way home was a nice touch. In December, in Michigan, at 3am. Never seen a girl do that before. Neither had the guy in the minivan next to us.
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
This conversation went from me banging other women's husbands to learning about baked goods. If that isn't personal growth I don't know what is.
Randomize