in a basement doing blow off a prince dvd next to a chick in a saddam mask
Just ate lunch with a paperclip again. Seriously, need to invest in plastic forks.
Yes. Being a lesbian's wingman is a fun as it sounds
Someone's having a good night if they're getting gummi bears and Astroglide.
Dude, you flipped off a cat from my balcony and yelled at it to get a house
Dude it's SB. It's a proven fact that all you need to survive on is beer, weed, chips and maybe some amphetamines
Well right but if we go, he may just disappear for a long time into the unknown with the drag queens.
I had to hypnotize my roommate last night so there's that.
There is someone out there for you right now. And we will find her. Or him. Her. Her, we'll start with tits.
there is a spider sitting on top of my weed like he owns it or some shit
no but seriously tf do i do? i have that spider phobia but i think my lvoe of the weed overpowers it
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
The struggles of a small town man whore
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
It doesn't matter if it's only been 3 days since you last changed your sheets. If your fuck buddy comments on how your bed smells like sex, it's time to change them again.
I’m the skeleton in his closet, but I only come out on Tuesday and Thursday afternoon and when his wife is out of town
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