he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
He told me he looked up all the foods that make cum taste better and he put it all on his moms shopping list. she came through my line. this ones a keeper I think.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
They both told everyone they fell in a mud puddle
Oh they definetly fell in the mud, repeatedly, on top of each other
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
It was sunday, you had a camel back of bloody mary stumbling around a dog park with no dog.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
On a better note: I'm on pace for 730 female produced orgasms in 2013.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
In my next life I better get to be a bird. Fuck flying. I'm gonna shit on your car. Every. Day.
Regret, thy taste is box wine.
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
How is it medically possible for my urine to smell like espresso
Chipotle farts are not good for seducing boys.
Randomize
