We fucked twice, I went to the bathroom to freshen up, and came back to him playing "Your Body is A Wonderland" on his guitar naked in my bed.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
She just did a bodyshot off herself. I don't care that it's only seven thirty, come pick her up.
she let a homeless guy feel her up so she could go for a ride in his shopping cart
All I remember is having a LONG talk with a 23 year old mother with a 5 year old kid at a bar who told me "it's not that bad"
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
See, thats where im at with my life, welcome to the slut yaht we will be cruising comfortably all summer at an extremely drunken relaxing pace S.S. Slut Bucket
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
Apparently I'm a "fire hazard"
Some dude peed on tonys floor because drunkness
They offered him a bucket as he was peeing and he was like "Nah, I'm good"
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
Double check your contract and see if it says anything about sleeping with your manager
Just a couple of adults talking about cum shots at 8am on presidents day
I cannot pick him out of a line up. I remember he is blonde and his half flaccid dick looks like gonzo. So unless he pulls down his pants I don't know who he is
At least your wife cheated on you. Women will feel bad for you. In a month there will boy bands that are jealous of your dick
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