i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
That's why there are breakfast margaritas.
The size of her vagina has nothing to do with the size of her heart bro
These 31 Gross People Really Put The ‘Trash’ In ‘Trashed’
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
His fucking was so lame I considered painting my nails during...
I have dibs on his crisis of faith.
Annnnd I didn't even notice there is a guy dancing in a jock strap beside me. That explains girls smiling at me
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
21 Bartenders That Are Definitely Winning At Their Jobs
No it was good. I serenaded the holding cell occupants with a fabulous rendition of Making Love out of Nothing at all. It was fucking amazing!
He stopped his car in the middle of ongoing traffic to ask me to marry him. Then he got pulled over. Yeah I'd say the slutty Dallas Cowboys costume was a success.
Your hotness may or may not have landed him in jail.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
Yeah ok. We can maid of honor each other since you don't like my boobs enough to lesbian marry me