In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
you threw your tampon into someones open car window...while they were driving.
Took her home last night and it was like trying to put an oyster in a slot machine. I may have drank a little too much.
Worst part of St. Paddy's...me drunkenly crying to a U2 cover band.
i wish i could tell you the night didnt begin with me drinking alone
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
We started snorting MDMA at 3 in the afternoon...it was never going to end well.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
apparently he thought telling me 'the weasel wants to come out to play' would somehow convince me to go down on him
Kinda sad when you get home on a Sunday morning and the paper guy HAND DELIVERS the newspaper to you...,
Basically, I'm sure one day I'll look back on this part of my life and be ashamed....
Guess who just got a Christian Beliefs class to seriously discuss the spiritual implications of dolphin rape?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I think there's a problem with society when I'm shopping for lingerie and I think "man some of these would make kickass shirts"
Rigtt?!
Randomize
