how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
thank you for introducing me to everyone on chat roulette as I was passed out.
she must've caught on when i went out for a "run" in jeans and a sweatshirt and came back holding a McDonalds bag and smelling like pot.
They got their marriage license when they were at the courthouse for her arraignment.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I guess I fell on the bar and kept trying to get back in telling the bouncer that I left my teeth at the bar. Woke up this morning with chipped tooth
He rolled up to the party in an ice cream truck. He was definitely my first priority
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Be safe. If you have intercourse with a boy use so many condoms this his penis is no longer recognizable.
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
Oh yeah, it was definitely the best sex of my life, I just don't think I can fix the kitchen table before my parents get back...
do you know why there was a glass jar of hot chocolate and a traffic flare in my shower?!! like where did that even come from
He’s disease free and drives a Porsche. What else does a girl need?
I’m sorry my lady boner messed up your mojo!!
Randomize
