yeah that always happens. i'm like the where's waldo of parties. i never even know where the fuck i'm at.
Fine. Just this once and because its veterans day will I send you a picture of my tits. You're lucky I love this country.
Party at my house. Beach themed. Clothing optional.
Wouldn't that make it "Nude Beach Themed?"
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
Just traded a shot of whiskey for a warm PBR on public transit. It's that's sort of night already.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I'm sending you a dick pic. Ill tell the other ppl in this pancheros its cool
Don't send a pic of dick unless it's inside the burrito
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
How don't you remember..? You were getting handfuls of skittles out from our bra screaming TASTE THE RAINBOW.
We had sex and then ordered pizza after. This relationship is looking good so far.
Just dropped the most perfectly rolled joint into the toilet I just finished taking a shit in, hadn't even had time to flush, 5 second rule?
No!
Only in this town do you have a bridesmaid shortage due to pregnancies.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
