Fuck U Mike is a golden god.
Mike give steph back her phone.
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
I just want you to know the floor between our rooms isnt sound proof "Captain Cock"
Have you ever looked at the 750mL bottle of wine on the seat next to you knowing that it's just not going to be enough?
Each and every day.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
I woke up this morning peeing out bubbles . I smell like baby wash . What the hell happened .
Do you know anything about the Easter basket sitting on my doorstep filled with porn and peeps?
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
90 seconds of pumping and 2 months of bragging all summer. So much for my reputation here.
Still not over the fact that we prayed to Jesus to help us win beer pong
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
ps. i have two very important words to sum up my night
which are?
library sex.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
I had to ask her to let go of my cock this morning so I could go home. She just kept saying "no, please, no..."
These freshmen are fun! The redhead wants to practice her blowjob skills with me and let me rate different moves!
Randomize
