Hey, do you have a beer bong you could drop off at my little brother's place?
So you're telling me it's impossible to have a "slight case" of chlamydia?
That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
If we keep treating our bodies like amusement parks we have another 10 years left at best.
remember when mike pissed in his pants and then put a double cheeburger in the pocketsss of said wet pants for "safe keeping"? yea drunker then that.
i convinced her i was a yoga teacher by showing her some warm-ups my high school track coach made up
we banged on the home plate. i wasnt even aware of the significance of where we were until afterwards hahaha
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
I feel like our low point of the night was when we had to start chasing with ice cubes and wheat thins.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I've blown him while he hit my bong, I've blown him while he played video games and now I'm looking for a new challenge. Don't even try suggesting a blumpkin.
I'm a hopeless romantic that likes rough sex. Judge me
They gave me patron and potatoes I couldn't say no
What could go wrong? i could have a mental breakdown with a bottle of champagne hand cuffed to a frat bro
Randomize
