and trust me i need no booty pop lessons
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
Im not gonna remember this tomorrow but the real money is in coke i wanna get a dark wood desk and cell coke then i can own taco bell and the xxl chalupa will be mine
No worries you cant actually turn into a wine snob if you brew it in your closet....
Nice. I ate a jello shot out of a bovine blow up doll's love hole last night
Alright we have to be drunk.before noon tomorrow. Its a new law i just got passed through congress. It goes into effect imediately
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
i don't know what part of 'duct tape bikini waxes' seemed even a little okay in our drunk minds, but i'm never drinking with your sister again
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
the good news is that even if it's Alex's, I can still say it's Colin's, because the kid will come out ginger anyway!
who knew there'd be a plus side to your ginger fetish one day?
They found you popping and locking it alone in the parking lot
My vagina is no longer accepting new clients.
My neighbor came out@4am in a pink nite gown n clotheslined a punk on a mo-ped w/her mop handle, then just walked back in her house like she just checked the mail. MILF 1 PUNK 0
He's honking my boob in his sleep
It's innocent and endearing in some way
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