I've come to the conclusion that as a grad student I would much rather prefer to get laid then get drunk
I think you know full well that a few years ago my stance was the polar opposite
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
2am update: i think I'm in Mexico but I found a dennys. Everyone but this cute family of 4 is speaking Spanish. Cute family of 4 is helping me out.
Is waterboarding an exceptable way of getting sober?
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
So who was trying to make it rain last night in the bathroom? There are pieces of dollar bill everywhere
CAN I EVER JUST MAKE OUT EITH SOMEONE AND NOT GET FRIEND REQUESTED BY THEM THE NEXT DAY.
BTW rolling him off the couch and onto that tarp was pure genius. He definitely pissed himself last night.
Nothing says "back to school" like walking in the first day with a hangover
Yes, bail money means jail. It also means lie to dad, do it now.
If I had an Australian accent I'd be unstoppable. Teach me how you talk
sorry I called you to cry about the state of the neopets economy
I had a dream that you were telling me how good you are at parkour and legit you were doing it just like Michael Scott...
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
