so all night Ive been that girl with her tits out @ the bar. I mean I dropped jaws, yo. But in a classy way.
Maybe i shouldn't have told him the key to getting in my pants was double vodka sodas and Nelly's song "grillz."
I just took my friends on a tour of all the places I've had sex in my house. I dont know if that's more slutty, or the fact that it took 2 hours to complete..
I just ate nachos topless with a fork. Live with meeee
I get way too drunk to be trusted with family heirlooms
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
casual night just sitting in the kitchen at 2 am eating stale chips and hot sauce while my friends younger sister is cleaning all the blood off my body
I just remember her dragging me inside in a panic saying we needed mentos and popcorn I have no fucking clue how we ended up asleep in her closet.
We watched game of thrones, broke up and I drove away blasting ridin solo while he dougied
you sternly forced jackson to start preheating the oven around midnight so you could make bagels in the morning
you were serious about those bagels
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Nothing like a near-death experience to start off your Thanksgiving...
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
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