it's taking a lot of effort to be mature and not reply to her with like a video of bestiality porn
I'm so excited for this wedding, I feel like a school girl about to get finger launched on the dance floor at the sadie hawkins dance
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
After walking in on us in the living room, he still insisted that he slept in my bed with me afterwards.
25 Facts Men Don’t Know About Women Until They Live Together
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
accidentally stumbled into a construction site at 3am on the way home. The bulldozer was locked so we had to settle for rerouting traffic with all the orange cones...
Drinking loves me for WHO I am
There's a whistle here and I just want to play my whistle song on it.
These 19 People Imagine Others When Banging Their SO
Last night I went to spank her while she was riding me and sack-tapped myself.
I just Miyagied my roommate through her first set of tit pics. Her fuck buddy owes me.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
The Wolf of Wall Street “I ain’t fuckin’ leaving!” speech when the cops broke up your party though...
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.