would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
yeah, i liked him til i heard he had a sac that could apparently smother my face.
so then they started chanting "LET'S GET A LITTLE BIT SCHWASTED. S-H-W-...WASTED!" theres nothing like partying with former high school cheerleaders
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
Is it bad that I had sex with another guy on my boyfriend's bed while he's out of town?
Just flip the mattress, it erases all
Done and done
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
We have an unspoken agreement. He helps me move and I give him a blow job. It's really unfair to him considering he doesn't know how much shit I have.
i had a mental breakdown over a math asignment proposed to a glass of chocolate milk then burned my hands when i acidentally leaned on the stove i have the grill marks burned on my hands i can see them
its only been 20 minuts since i last saw you
Apparently, the right response to, "How do you feel about a terrorist being in the area?" isn't, "Well, we have vodka in the freezer, so we're good for now."
Everyone keeps telling me I look so healthy and happy today: the power of the penis people!!
Trying to take a nap and my brain decides to play "lets have flashbacks every time you blew it with a chick in college". It's a montage of stupidity and youthful inexperience. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
Dude, they hit that lizard part of my brain that tells me to fuck people.
Preach sister.
Watching porn.....Adele is playing in the background...so many emotions right now...so many.
Randomize
