escape the fate? dumbest band name ever. how about escape the fart. now that is a show i would go see!
You should probably wake up already as I have yet another story for you. Teaser? Blood from knife wound. Tequila. Guitar hero. Kitchen counter. Lawyer.
It's just a condom. Most people would commend me for saying I was going to start using them, and you're acting like I'm going to try heroin.
Watching the gap toothed girl get more ass than me is almost devastating.
Girl on the bus just slammed her book shut, turned to me and said "I'm way to fucking high to be studying"
Considering showing up at your house with coronas. I'll be wearing a sombrero and that's it.
Party city is having a sale on maracas
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
Was my mother there when I broke the stipper pole?
Hardest I think I've ever had to work for a shack. Whatevs. Still gonna get my way though. I'll start respecting myself on Monday
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
When that bartender tried to tell us he sang like Sade, I knew it was time to go
IF YOU HAVE THE CHANCE TO HIT THAT, AND YOU DON'T, I WILL FUCKING CRUCIFY YOU.
You're such a supportive sister.
Helped a guy at work today that did nothing but stare at my chest....safe to say the Girls were looking G.O.O.D. today.
Randomize
