You work out of a Hotel?
i wish we had morning classes together so we can spike our coffee.
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
Haha so I huess that means he's a little over 7. I can use my throat as a ruler!!
One less school supply you need to buy!!
I just had a formal request to dress as a boyscout for my meeting with Legal on Friday. From Legal. Time to go home.
An attempt at squeezing a tomato to make a bloody mary just says desperation all over it....
New rule : you aren't allowed anything . Ever .
You then proceeded to tell me how good of a cook you were and put raw cookie dough in the champagne.
Why am I the only one golf clapping for the vomiting girl on the train who just fell of her seat into her own vomit
I know you are gonna wanna ask a lot of questions but when we are home I need to cover your face with deli meat and photograph it
It's like the first time your mom catches you masturbating. We both know what she saw. We're just not talking about it...
The bros used their bong water as pong water but I walked in mid game and didn't know so they hit our first cup and I chugged it.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
I had to explain to the doctor why I'm peeing blood. He still didn't believe a girl would have that much sex... You could feel the judgement forming in the room when I went into the details...
Damn, well a girls gotta get laid too
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