apparently i walked up to the counter, put $30 worth of snacks next to this girl, and went 'uhh i have no money'
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
Talking to this girl is like playing minesweeper on hard. There's red flags everywhere.
You told the bartender you needed 2 beers, and a shot of his cum...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm just trying to jam my tits into some coconuts and I'll be on my way
Warning: at some point today you will probably see several pics of me 69-ing a blow up turtle show up on facebook. Just disregard them.
Long story short, the rash from your last birthday party told me not to go to this one.
two questions - what stuff of mine was pawned and who has the pawn tickets.
Sorry about giving you those ripped gym shorts after my dog ate your pants, but after the awkard BJ incident I didn't plan on hearing from you again
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I'm going to get high and eat ice cream until the pain goes away. You're welcome to join.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
But really, what kind of hoe life adventure in Mexico would you do that would top me blowing a trucker?
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