Nicole vs. Life
I thought it was weird that her dad told me to finish and get out after he walked in on us. I like him
I think the sex offender registry is kind of a VIP list. You get to not live near noisy schools and parks and all your neighbors get to know you.
Skinny jeans should not be made in size 14. Then, it's just a lie.
i just practiced my bj skills on a banana in front of the mirror
its going to be a good night
i'd fuck the guy who invented dead baby jokes.
Yea...but the guy who is beating me has a ponytail. So actually, I'm the winner here.
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Don't mind the bowl full of ashes in the sink. I meant to set that on fire.
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You want to get day drunk this afternoon and watch these guys build a house across the street?
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I found a used condom and a hairbrush in my dryer this morning.
Hiring someone to do your laundry would be a good investment.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
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