I haven't seen Daniella all day...are you sure she was safe going home with that guy?
oh don't worry! i asked him if he was a rapist. he said no
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
Just had to pull out another loan to pay for that public drunkenness citation. I am so ready to graduate.
I'm sober enough to question why I have your name as "the wolverine" in my phone.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Guess who just got out of a ticket because the cop liked her costume? THIS GIRL.
Getting "I couldn't find the front door so I climbed in through window" drunk seems to be a habit of yours
There is what appears to be urine on the woman's bathroom sink. I just have so many questions right now.
What, I can't laugh at my sister being driven crazy by Facebook randomly assigning chat significance to the guy she lost her virginity to?
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
No no no, I want to share him with you. Think of it as me sharing a piece of delicious pie with you. He was THAT GOOD.
I just thought you should know... Instead of a glass of wine before bed I am having a few shots of 1800. This is what being a night shift nurse will do to you... Standing in your kitchen in your undies doing shots
Randomize
