I miss Bob Barker.
Yeah, more like Douche Carey...
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
Just wrote a paper about alcohol abuse that sounded like my weekend...
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
After giving a back rub to someone in the bathroom of the theater, he ripped an "employees must wash hands" sign off the wall to prove that he could and proceeded to hang it up in his house.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
Please root for the ravens. I now have oral sex riding on this and it's been sooooo long
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I don't know if you've ever seen a group of 20 year olds reenact a rectal prolapse, but 'majestic' isn't really the word I'd use...
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
you had her IN YOUR BED NO PANTS AND YOU GAVE HER THW BOOT?!?!?!
Stage five clinger bro. had to go.
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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