We got drunk before dinner. People at the other tables were praying for us.
I've hooked up with six guys in my ethics class next semester...I feel like I've failed already
I haven't seen any of my friends sober in months. We have classes together.
Today the house voted to defund Planned Parenthood but to continue funding NASCAR. I fucking hate everything.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just fucked two guys in less than 12 hours. i miss this part of being single.
and by single i mean slutty
dude what did you give her she's eating her pocket lint
Homeboy was juggling while taking bong rips. Of course he got laid.
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
he congratulated me on my ability to grow long hair after pulling it to see if i had extensions
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
Ever since the Christmas fiasco of '08, I can no longer watch Rudolf the Red nosed reindeer without getting a hard on
As I came the Sportcenter app played that "dah nuh nuh" chime. Top ten life highlight?
Just text him and be like do you want this pussy or not. You have three seconds to respond.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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