other girls like to lick balls but none of them live for it like u do
Is today national text-a-girl-whose-had-your-dick-in-her-mouth day and I just wasn't aware?? I am getting the most random "just saying hey" texts ever and that's the only common denominator.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I can't believe I've come to a point in my life where sex for a birthday present is acceptable
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
tell me why they applauded then the bartender locked himself in the bathroom when i walked into the bar today ????
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
I would say don't do anything I wouldn't do, but we both know I forget about my personal safely when getting laid is on the line
I don't know what happened last night. But I just woke up in the high school boiler room
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
Randomize
