just snorted lines off a mancala board. I'm destined to win this game.
its so hard to text. the buttons are tickling my fingers
I'm drinking Leinenkugel through a Red Vine. I'm not drunk. I'm just happy with my life so far.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
Her roommate "grounded" her because she drunkenly tried to fill their fish tank with vodka
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
Sure. But we have to be quiet.
Ninja mode activated
no it was not a "magical experience". After we dropped, he just sat there staring at my laptop going "apple makes beautiful things".
I'm pretty sure that the bartender arranged a marriage for me last night. Sounds like a legit birthday present to me.
I gave you keys to my house and drugs. This must mean we're in a relationship.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Randomize
