I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
I just heard a woman call her child a butt face. Repeatedly. He's crying now. I love walmart.
If I saw Perez Hilton naked I think I would stick a lit candle down my throat.
I just encountered the most annoying guy on the planet. I wanted to slap his milkshake out of his fat-boy hands while he was talking to me at the same time as slurping his liquid fat.
I love milkshakes.
Not the point.
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Yea. I think between making the bride puke, feeling up the maid of honor, and sleeping with a bridesmaid. I did my part.
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
How do you get a 7 on a pregnancy test?
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
my drunken justification for peeing in her closet was that her shoes were ugly
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
This is what you sent me from the other side of the pool, "Idk but thers a pool n l wanna get naked take off my trunks ill paddle with my dick"
Ugh. I'm going to die alone, sister. Half-eaten by one of my thirty-seven cats and clutching a martini shaker
Drake has all the answers
Randomize
