We are walking down to the lake and then i dont know. Where did you sleep?
Places.
Plural? Please tell.
i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
smell my finger.
First time i ever had an awkward silence during sex.
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He dumped me and I don't wanna fuck his best friend for revenge. Is this what maturity feels like?
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
You blinded her by spitting vodka in her eyes, the vodka you had just taken as a body shot off of her.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Now it's a thing. He's kind of a creeper and now he's lotioning me. This is going to turn into a Buffalo Bull situation.
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
You know something is wrong with your lifestyle when you have to clean easy Mac cheese powder off of your scale
at least it's not cocaine like last time
Side piece definitely knows about my GF. Said it was sexy when I go commando, then left me pantsless in the club bathroom
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