I'm looking for sex. Do you know her?
How'd it feel making her break her religion?
before tonight, i was terrified of what tequila would make me do. but all it did was make me hook up with a movie star. sooo basically tequila's my new fave
swear to god some girl just crawled out of the washing machine. this is intense.
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Judging by her face, I'd say she's at least dabbled with meth...
Sometimes I wonder why I hang out with you. And then you show up half naked at my door with a half gal of vodka, and I remember why.
So many people have lost their virginity on my futon... I think it is only the right thing to bronze it and put it on display
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
sooo... you have no idea who nailed their tubesocks to my wall?
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How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
He's probably hung over. I sure as hell am. I want to pop out my eyeballs with a fork and soak them in cold water
Just smokin in the creek with some deer, they like the smoke, I know.
i feel like i should invite him over so he can cockblock my roommate one last time before he graduates. for old times sake, ya know
Your biggest crisis right now is that you can't decide whether to keep hooking up with AN NFL PLAYER or try to rekindle your relationship with your ex. You are a walking white girl problem.
Hey, I found that piece of pizza you lost in my bed last night. Never again...