Its not like he dircectly choose a cheeseburger over sex, it was more like I said seductively "I really appreciate this and I'm going to make it up to you anyway I can" and he replied "i want a bacon cheeseburger"
i guess he just knew i was going to sleep with him either way
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
Two kids are drinking pounders in class. I think I'm hanging out with the wrong group of friends.
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
She definitely looked like a troll, but I had take one for the team. Or at least thats what I keep telling myself
At beerfest, hammered, going to try to not get naked in public but i cant make any promises
Just saw a girl duct tape a cigarette back together..I feel like my life is shambles for being present for this
But apparently I got kicked in the head by a stripper at some point
I actually took a sword out of your hands. You were samurai slashing lemons to make chasers.
Smoked a blunt with a girl i met at the bus stop today. What you did today is irrelevant
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
You were visibly distraught that my boyfriend and I didn't have sex in your bed. You forced us to take your condoms.
My moms new boyfriend looks like Stu Pickles if he was in a biker gang. He gave me free coke though, so come party?
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
How did the test come back?
I've never been so happy to have a yeast infection. And i got a free pack of birth control
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