I'm blazed at jack in the box and my order number is 420. I wish everything in the world made this much sense.
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
I forget the details, but I'm told that I drunkenly stalked him around floor yelling obscure Jewish laws at him
If a "boob" guy and an "ass" guy are discussing which you are better qualified for....just let them
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I should also mention that having been a sheltered child, I am conditioned to have serious kinks and find upper bodies of either sex attractive. And legs.
Apparently after awhile self preservation trumps libido. This is new news to me.
He puked in the voicemail. That's a true friend right there.
Pro: Drunk Portland Strip Club. Con: Monday morning hangover at work. Pro: boobs. Con: Sleep deprivation. The Pro's are winning.
I would agree. Add some coffee to the booze. It will cut down on sleep deprivation.
someone wrote my own number down on my hand and then call me.
I am so disappointed that he didn't steal a Christmas tree last night.
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
I get sad thinking about all the sex I’m missing out on because of the virus
I instituted “quarantine and chill” months ago. It’s not like penises go soft just because they’re working at home.
Randomize
