just got a girls number while on a 5 am adderall cig break this is college at its finest
Well if I am having twins, at least I'll finally have 2 kids by the same father.
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
"So you think you can dance" turned into "so you think you can run and slide across the bar"...Jack Daniels wins
Does he cat effect his dick pics to you? Because THAT is true love
I'm about to fuck a girl in an old school Tony Kukoc Bulls jersey. About to earn my third championship ring in sex
I'm 99.9% sure the people upstairs are using walki-talkies to talk to each other across the room. Too high for this shit
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
No more twerking this week. I think I dislocated a boob.
Mom and I shoplifted today. Her idea.
Retirement sounds fun.
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
Were you the one who yelled "FOR GLORYHOLE!" then punched a hole through my door?
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
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