Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
i wanna stay in my bed and fart for a few more hours
I am so high I am beginning to unironically like Vanessa Carlton.
You told me alcohol would be the death of you then ordered 10 shots of tequila.
I blacked out the second time 3am rolled around. My brain was taking a beating trying to do that math.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
I thought I was pretty much sober now but then I realized I've been eating scrambled eggs with my hands...
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
I just remembered I made you punch yourself in the face last night and I would like to formally apologize for that even though it was hilarious.
I woke up hugging my purse and I found a business card in my underwear. How?
You rinsed the beer pong ball off in my White Russian
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
The only thing I remember is the 300 pound man breaking ur railing from sliding down it at 3 am. Must of been a good night.
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