Nyc is like a mosaic of my failed dates.
miscarriage! now THATS a gift from god.
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
Apparently, there is a horrible ghonorrea out break at our school. Woo! What a way for Loyola to welcome us back.
I know everyone screamed lady cop instead of cops. I wanted to apologize to her for our chauvinism
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
I made a blanket fort and am drinking Gatorade and eating donuts watching 500 days of summer. I can't keep spending my saturdays like this.
I may have to steal the boat sober, but I feel that would be harder to explain.
PLEASE. I won't throw up on the floor this time. Or fuck in the bathroom. Or dance on the pool table. So PLEASE.
The sex was so bad. I kept sending people snapchats of my face during it.
I messaged him asking for his address. He replied with the address then said, "If you're gonna stalk me, I'm the third window on the side and usually get naked around 8am and anytime randomly after 6pm (listen for music).. If you're sending anthrax, I'm 6'2" 225lbs so send a good amount."
My logic for bringing him home was, he's in law school so odds are he wouldn't kill me.
Denim handjobs are the worst handjobs. I hate all handjobs. Why do people even.
I’m going to cut back. New Year, New Me
I would never wish less dick on anyone but do what you gotta do
I think it's time for tequila and I to go our separate ways
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