I just made out with a guy for $7.
We woke up next to each other with a mutual look of disgust, and then he left. I knew I should have gone for the younger brother.
You know you had a bad blackout when you forget you held the stanley cup.
on todays agenda: meeting with a life coach then going to the dollar store to buy batteries for my vibrator. clearly im still unemployed.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
First if all, whoever designed penis shaped ice cubes is clearly daring me to shove them up my vagina
Oh that could end badly if you get them mixed up.. you know who I think you should focus on?? THE ONE WITH THE BIG BLACK COCK, just sayin
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
If I had 3 wishes one would for sure be a designated driver for life that gives hand jobs.
I've never been so tempted to check my phone during sex in my life.
come over we're fb stalking guys who were dressed as bananas last night because i can't remember which one i blew
I just licked a piece of cheese off my phone screen if that makes you feel any better
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
Went to bed in my room fully clothed, woke up naked in the kitchen with the dog looking unamused.
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
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