I do no wrong. I am always right. Right? I forget why I am sending this. It seemed relevant.
hell no. last time, i couldn't pee straight for a week.
All I know is that we apparently made a drink we named The Single Girl which is rum, vodka, grain alcohol, and sprite and rolled around in the backyard.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
I don't think everyone found it as funny as I did... Nothing says "Party's Over" like the sound of a pump action shotgun.
He's a Shit stain on my heart
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
Myy bathroom floor makes me think I'm on Mars. Also. Did you realize that yesterday we perfected thee mind high-five??
Making a me burrito to ward off the cold...and the aloneness of my vagina
I just looked at your pics on Facebook....there was cake? Where the fuck was I!?
We were apparently using marine hand signals to communicate to one another where to meet up in the house to hook up.
Didn't even know I knew marine hand signals.
There is a drunken, assless white chick here at this bar wearing a shirt that says "REAL WOMEN TWERK FOR JESUS". I have officially had it with our generation.
I'm all about clean living these days
You started your day with fried chicken and a bloody
... after you woke up in your own urine
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Randomize
