she has a miserable personality but its a good think you dont have sex with that
pussy has no personality
Amen to that
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
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Trying to ignore the fact that a kid I hooked up with twice just gave me spare keys to his house ... and car.
You have ruined sex with him for me. Now all I think is "boy scout" and I want to go home
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
My mom just told me not to dance on any tables on Halloween...I'm choosing to take that statement as a joke
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
But seriously, I love you and you are a good person and I'll get you some ecstasy
Next time I pee on a car, I'll text you.
I'd give anything to be driving a pirate ship wearing nothing but a coconut bra and a grass skirt eating a pizza and watching dolphins jump in the waves. Dreams ya gotta have dreams
Just because I'm sleeping with him doesn't mean I'm in love with him, it means that I want to have sex with someone who isn't a serial killer.
I just licked honey off my own tit. Is there anything about that which doesn't SCREAM single???
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
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