i'm pissing behind 7/11. if you guys leave... i'll think it's funny too
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
Living right is spending a lot of time in someone's ass
Is there some kind of disinfectant spray people use? Why would anyone want to eat ass??
So after i got done, she went over and got out her gecko, I felt like I was in an X rated geiko commercial.
What I lack in compassion I make up for in lack of compassion
He tried to blame not having a condom on the economy.
I FEEL like I celebrated someone's 21st, but really I just celebrated Tuesday.
It was all fun and games until she said "you're so pretty I wanna punch you in the face" and the proceeded to punch her in the face
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
I am putting together a break up mix and its pretty much the best of Phil Collins
Say what you want about my van, but I've got more action there than in my apartment. A body pillow and a joint still go a long way!
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
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