I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
Also you were throwing your phone yelling this is durable as shit
RA chick in a Christmas onsie chased us up 5 flights of stairs. I need to stop violating guest policy
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
Made it just outside my dorm and yack on the front dirt. Wave to a dad thats staring, continue on my way.
Lesson learned. No more vodka and toaster strudel
Nothing but goodness could come from two friends getting naked. Think of all the good advice and other things we could give to each other.
I'll tell you that it involved a pair of pliers and a trip to the ER.
I demand a full explanation right now.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
We were trying to organize all the customers to hold a window pickle race. as of 10:37 pm last night we are no longer allowed in our McDonalds.
my grocery list today consisted of condoms. and butter.
umm... whats the butter for?
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
My shower turned into a bath, turned into me lying on the shower floor with the water running over me... That hung over..
Randomize
