I can tuck mytits in my pants
and when i put it inside her she yelled "welcome aboard!"
Yes because finding a guy to give head to is pretty difficult.
I mean not really
Obviously that's why it was a joke you are so stupid it's impossible.
So I hogged the stall at Denny's for so long that a little kid shit his pants and ran crying to his mother. Am I a terrible person for this being the proudest moment of my life?
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
I got a handjob to the OC theme song. It was like going back in time 7 years.
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
Just an FYI: The offer for you to come snow blow my driveway in return for sexual favors is still on the table
I'm currently bartering with this guy so I can fuck his bi girlfriend. We're at 5 pizzas and he gets to watch us make-out.
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
Just remembered I railed lines while holding a puppy
HAPPY AIDS-LESS FOURTH OF JULY YOU HEALTHY FUCK
Nah I think he's a bit weirded out I worked out where he lives from a Facebook photo
I got my gum stuck on his balls.
If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns
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