i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
I bought my dad an absinthe brewing kit for christmas.. looks like tripping with my dad is in my near future.
It's sad because pictures are supposed to say a thousand words, and theirs just say 'fat'
Just mixed my liver cleanse with Bacardi. Best. Thing. Ever.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Fuck. These are the symptoms I had when I was pregnant. This could be bad.
he thinks the dog can do a keg stand. i will let you know how it turns out
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
there is something about beer and popsicles that make the world go round
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
But you're the one who should be jamming foreign objects into my vaj instead of an old weird lady. I mean, it is your birthday....
No one is allowed to go to bed until all bottles are finished, I don't want to feel my face tongiht. Do you understand?
All of the hungover. I've changed not showered but can't quite make it to the booze.
WE'RE IN THE RED ZONE PLAY THRU THE PAIN
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
Randomize
